Life is HARD Y'all!
It just is. It's overwhelming, we get stressed, we're overcome by fear, sadness, grief. Obstacles come our way and life just isn't everything we thought it would be. It isn't everything we planned for it to be.
Our happily ever after has taken a detour, a horrible wrong left turn and we can't seem to get back on the right path. It's not supposed to be this way! This is NOT what I signed up for and not what I dreamed about as a little girl!
At some point in our lives we have all experienced life! The difficult parts that we just haven't really wanted to be a part of, the parts we wished we could bypass. I can tell you this, I cried a lot during the weeks and months after my secret was revealed to my husband. I had no idea I had that many tears inside of me. But you know what? I learned something amazing through those tears! As I shed each tear, I began to heal from the inside out.
Because you see, at first, I didn't want to heal. I didn't even want to feel. I wanted to numb with alcohol, with food, with exercise, with shopping, anything that would numb where I couldn't even feel the pain of the shame I had caused my husband and the shame I felt myself.
You see, sometimes we have to do the things we KNOW we should do, and not just the things that we FEEL like we should do.
My heart and my feelings were the ones that led me astray in the first place. My heart and my feelings told me that I needed to feel admired at the expense of my family. My feelings told me to ignore my faith because this felt too good not to be good. My heart told me that someone else could fulfill me besides the Lord. My feelings told me that I deserved better than the good that I already had.
All of those were lies straight from the pits of hell.
You see, I needed to DO the RIGHT things whether I felt like it or not. I didn't feel like reading my bible, praying or listening to worship music. I didn't want to do it. But I did. I didn't want to because I had never felt so far away from God before in my entire life. I felt like He was lightyears away from me. He wasn't. I was the one who was distant. So I had to do the things that I didn't feel like doing to get me back to the God that never left me.
As I began to dig into my bible study, "When Godly People Do Ungodly Things" God started to soften my heart and I began to heal. God opened my eyes and allowed me to see that He loved even me, someone who had fallen so very far away from him, and YES, even Christians fall short. ESPECIALLY Christians fall, because that's where the enemy thinks he's found victory.
Many of us find it easy to read the word, pray, and praise Him on the days that we feel like it, but what about those days that we don't? It's a little harder to push through, huh? My prayer is that you make a commitment to the Lord and to yourself right now, that you will always do the thing that you KNOW is right above what you FEEL is right. It's not always going to be a good day, there will be a lot of not-so-good days! Praise Him anyway! Worship Him anyway! Learn about Him anyway! Study Him anyway! I promise it is not in vain!
Friend, if you are in a season of hardship, I'm praying for you. This circumstance you’re in is difficult. It just is. But, you have to endure the pain to get on the other side of it. We can’t just skip out on a season of trial. We have to graduate from it.
Spend some time thinking about how you handle life's situations and if you do the things you FEEL like doing or the things you KNOW you need to do.
Ezekiel 18:30 says Why? Because, family of Israel, I will judge each of you only for what you do!” This is what the Lord GOD said. “So come back to me! Stop committing those crimes and do away with those things that cause you to sin! It's time we come back to him, doing the thing we know that we need to do and turn from the things that are causing us to sin.
Sweet friend, what things have you been neglecting because you just haven't been "feeling" it or maybe you were like me and you were just too ashamed to approach the throne of God. What's been holding you back from living the abundant life in Christ?
Father, I admit that at times I am led by my feelings and my emotions. Equip me to be strong enough to do the things that I know I need to do and not just the things that I want to do or feel like doing. Help me to do away with the things that cause me to sin and bring me back to you. Amen.